Question of the Week? April 9th-April 16th- What would you think?
11 Comments Published by His Daily Variety on Wednesday, April 09, 2008 at 10:47 AM.
The men have driven me so crazy. Now I’m back to the ladies.
So here is the question of the week. How would you feel if one of your friend of many years told you out of left field they where “tired” of being gay and started dating women only? Would you think he was losing faith in our “community”? Is he a trader? Is he lying to him self? BTW he has never once said, acted, eluded to being bi-sexual.
He's lying to himself. No one can change their sexual orientation. Further, presuming he is not disclosing his gay past to his new female friends, he's likely to wind up hurting someone when the truth comes out (and it will).
I'm amused when I here ignorant statements like "I'm tired of the gay community." The community is made up of individual people, and each of us has to look at our own role in creating the kind of community we want to live in. If you are dissatisfied with the quality of the people you are meeting, go out and meet new people doing new and different things. Blaming the "community" on your inability to find a mate is simply dishonest.
Thank you Bernie,
I hate to agree, not because I don't concur, but I like to leave an openiness to the flow and convo. Anyway I have to say, you hit it right on the head. We need to learn to get out of our own way, and understand why someone would want to feel like they need to give on on there community.
Try my best to support them, if our friendship was only based on the fact you were gay, then that sucks.
i agree with both bernie and khama but i have notice alot of black gay men referencing to the fact that they should start dating women due to being hurt by our community but at the end of the day it is a cop out to me. maybe its that person who hasnt found that right person and keep finding losers. i dnt think you should give up on this OUR COMMUNITY!
i agree with the comments posted above. i do think, though, that someone who thinks his life will be better if he can [pretend to] be straight is indicative of a deeper problem. society at large says we have no value, that we are wrong; is it any wonder that we learn this dysfunction and apply it in our own communities?
i've actually been in this situation with friends on more than one occasion. and if it happens again, i will do what i've done before: love them and let them know i'm there if they need me. the last thing anybody who's in that much pain needs is someone else dumping on him...
J, Sexuality is fluid, hell if one day you like tall, dark and handsome and the next day you like short, sea bright and cute... why can't you like a woman. Gay men box themselves in to much.. I say Set Your Soul Free love who you love and know things change. Just love and be happy, maybe if gay men stop trying to define love they will find more of it.
Signed...Boo
oh btw yall both look drunk and gay as hell in that pic..
signed...boo
Interesting question Jared!! Love is love! I wholeheartedly agree with Kinsey's view on sexuality. We all fall in a continuum of sexuality...we are dichotomous in nature! Although is easier to box yourself into one category, you disavow a big part of yourself by doing so. If the person completes you and makes you feel like no one else had, does their gender really matter???
Choice is what sex and love is about. Getting tired of something is human nature, besides it might be about being there and doing that with alot of roles in life.
I have a friend who did that last year. He announced in January that effective at the end of February, he would not be dating any more men. He would eventually date women, even though he had never done that before.
He dealt with men up to the last day before the date that started his "new life." He abstained for a few months. Then he went right back to men.
I don't remember ever having those and I've lived in Maryland most of my life. I'll have to get a box.