11:11am Facebook Question of the Day
0 Comments Published by His Daily Variety on Friday, November 27, 2009 at 4:47 PM.
How would you deal with an old date that is still very friendly with your family? Scenario you bring your new date to Thanksgiving at the Family's house and your old date is seating there eating turkey and knee deep in a game of spades with Uncle Sam. What do you do?
11:11am Facebook Question of the Day
0 Comments Published by His Daily Variety on Thursday, November 19, 2009 at 1:41 PM.
Do you think if there wasn’t any sexual desire would we all be coupled? How would you pick your partners if sex wasn’t on the table?
Facebook; 11:11am Question of the Day
1 Comments Published by His Daily Variety on Wednesday, November 04, 2009 at 5:49 PM.
Would you let an absentee parent back in your life? Even if they never made any contact with them from day 1? Sidebar- I like us to share openly, so please speak from the heart, and not like a PR rep
Facebook; 11:11am Question of the day
0 Comments Published by His Daily Variety on Tuesday, November 03, 2009 at 5:14 PM.
We will keep it light today and do a little walking down memory lane. What was the first concert you went to? Tell us about it!My Godmother got me first row seats to Boys to men, TLC, and Jodeci. And special guest Oaktown 357. OMG
Facebook; 11:11am Question of the day
1 Comments Published by His Daily Variety on Monday, November 02, 2009 at 4:14 PM.
You have an openly gay friend that decides to go back to females. Would you support him? Also is there an unspoken rule to now keep your mouth shut about his past?
Aniff Baker
I would support them, regardless of how I feel about the situation and if things dont work out and he decedes to go back to men, I would support him in that also...lol
Charles Baptiste-Williams II
I have a friend who did this and has been happily married for about 4 years now... everybody's life is a completely different journey and i support my friends in whatever decisions they decide is right for them at that time... who am i to judge.
As for his past, if he was with a guy I wouldn't divulge his past so I wouldn’t do it now that he is with a woman.
Brian Batista
Of course...do as you like. And no, I would not keep my mouth shut about his past...the final breakdown is that it's just sex. If your attracted to guys, then females and back to guys then knock yourself out, experience it all...sexual hang-ups can be bad :-)
Khalid Kamau
I would support him if I believed in him.
I would keep my mouth shut, in general, but I'd prolly talk about it w/ my shorty.
Taruan Mabry
I have to say that if they truly believe they are bisexual and will be open and honest to their partner's (dating partners) mutually, I think as a friend its important to be supportive of such a decision. We all have our "things" that some or most just won't get. Doesn't mean we wouldn't want support from loved ones.
Lee Smith
I actually have a freind going through this right now. He has not yet met a woman, but he deperately wants to and is attending "Go straight " ministries with his church . His family constantly chastizes him about how he is going to hell because of his "choice". So yes, I support him on his quest, but I have expressed to him that I know he is truly UNHAPPY and is only on this quest because he hasnt been successful in finding love as a gay man, and feels his life would be easier if he would just "CHOOSE" to be straight. He is realizing how hard that actually is, and how much MORE unhappy he is because of the decisions he is forcing himself to try to make. I think the ultimate support for a freind is to be completely honest with them and make sure that they are are making the most informed and intelligent decision for their lives. Live your TRUTH... life is hard, but its harder when you make the wrong decisions and if your freinds dont call you out when they see a train coming to hit you on your journey!
Dre Day
Basically,I say do what it is that you like in order to make you happy. However your new life does not change our past experiences. The nature of our friendship is that we have times and events that we shared. If I openly and freely talk about them now, there is no way I am going to change who I am and how I interact with you because you made a change. I believe that if your friend was openly gay, he should not have any trouble telling the female about his past gay life. Personally I feel, at least morally, that it is his duty to tell the female.
John San Juan
I liken the way I feel about this to how black girls feel when black men date white women: pure unadulterated, nonsensical rage. I know it's a recession, but it's not like there is a recession ON MEN. Is gay dating so difficult you need to run back to women? I cannot justify my abhorrence, nor can I provide any logical reasoning behind it. I have a friend who says daily he will go back to women and I READ him thoroughly. I personally do not believe in Bisexuality. I always say "Bisexuality is just a layover to GayTown USA." And yes, it's a one-way ticket.
Khalid Kamau
Damn JSJ.. Thas DEEP! Well said.
Khalid Kamau
I've dated both men & womyn. BOTH have their challenges.
Neither one is any easier than the other.
Dre Day
@ JSJ, kudos on the usage of abhorrence, this early in the week. You had your wheaties this morning.
Nicholas Sattaur
i seriously be\leive that its these men that confirms the anti-gay activists that its a "choice". They should not hide their past from any once current. Its deceitful to one's self and to their partner. If their current partner ever asks (assuming she hears about his history) - it you have ever been with a man - he will more than likely say no - which is being dishonest to the person you are currently with. So that said, although he is my friend, i will have to cut the freindship with him - ie not support his decision, as by him doing so makes us as gay men and our community seem weak, confused, and confirms that zsleeping with men is a choice. And anyone that can place such descriptions on my gay community is not deserving of support muchless friendship. And in the end, it is his choice - with or without support. And yes, i will tell his current gf that he used to sleep with men. There is no way, other than social conformity that a man who used to sleep with men, would completly abondon that lifestyle...in then end, he will, without a doubt, cheat on her with a man!
John San Juan
Sorry guys, I can't always be the voice of pragmatism and reasoning on 11:11. I'm human too. When Anne Heche dumped Ellen DeGeneres (and began dating men again...after subsequently professing to being abducted by aliens...Like seriously, WTF... SEE???), I was so livid I wanted to stab her eyes with a searing hot butter knife.
Nicholas Sattaur
@JSJ - i think Anne was just being experimental with Ellen....or maybe it was a publicity stunt...she's not that popular after all....
Rahsaan Scott
YES I WOULD SUPPORT HIM ESPECIALLY IF HE FEELS ITS LOVE. LOVE IN BOUNDLESS & INFINITE. LOVE KNOWS NO COLOR OR GENDER IT JUST IS!
Jared Paul Shuler
Well then the question become, what if he gets with these said women, and is going back to men for the "sex" we still as supportive?
Lee Smith
I would wholeheartedly agree with you JSJ. I alo agree that bisexuality is a cop out. Dont confuse the sex "act" with your sexual identity. Yes, even as a gay man, I have the equipment to have sex with women, and stil find women attractive enough that if I had to, I COULD, but do I want to? HELL NO!! Bisexuality to me fuels those who believe that sexual identity is about choice. It places the emphasis on the "sex act". stand up, and be honest about who and what you are. PERIOD!
Nicholas Sattaur
....which is inevitable - once you have that penchant, its only possible to keep it latent for so long - that is why i would not support in the first place
Brian MrIncredible Harris
I had a friend who did this he got married to a female and they had a daughter then after 7 years he felt unhappy and left her and we back to men, I think he had already started cheating anyway, he got into a relationship with a guy for a few months then when it didnt work out he went back to the wife, that lasted a few months then they split again and he got in a relationship with a guy and was moving out of state with him, it fell apart, he was single for like a month then suddenly he says him and the wife getting back together and that was about 3 months ago, I'm just waiting cuz when one don't work he jumps the fence to the opposite sex yet the only woman he goes to is her but he meets different men, I say just be true to who u are and what u really feel. Cuz I think he just ruining this womans life and his daughter with all that flip flopping. He married her cuz his family and church pressured him about being gay, now he go back and forth when one isn't working out. It's sad.
Lee Smith
HELL NO JARED!!! If they are living a double life, they need to be called the F*CK OUT!!! sorry!! Its totally NOT fair to either party involved! It speaks to their cowardice to live an authentic life!
John San Juan
Once again, the overly PC and "love conquers all" responses are too vomitous too early on a Monday morning. YES to: 1. Church pressures, 2. Inevitable male cheating, 3. Supporting the theory that homosexuality is a choice - as reasons why there is a FILM OF INAUTHENTICITY to those who creep back to purported heterosexuality.
Adam Benjamin Irby
AMEN @ John San Juan
Kyon Saucier
As long as he is happy and being real about his situation then I have would have nothing to say.
Jared Paul Shuler
Oh Johnny! LMAO
Tramel A Coleman
Depends on the reason hes "going back to dating women"..And yes i would keep my mouth shut as long as he dont try to convert me over to "dating women",or look down on other gays...I have old buddies that got "saved" and now talks about gays liked he never had a piece of Trade in his BUNS in which isnt cool,so i dont deal with him at all anymore!
Randall Tuckerseems
seems as though your friend is a little confused to say the least...seems as though he is fighting an internal struggle...I would support him but would make it clear that I would not support him hurting someone else just to work out his own issues/demons....Of course there is an unspoken rule it doesn't matter the type of relationship a friend should never discuss a previous relationship with the current....
Dre Day
I am not supporting nonsense
Eddie Griffith
Of course u support him and yes u keep your mouth shut. He supports u
Christopher White
He is confused, but for a friend I would support him and keep quiet.
Jeremy C. DiPinto
Exactly. He's confused, but let him figure that out on his own. Or he could legitimately be a bisexual. Who knows. But he should know that women are hip to that back and forth nowadays. They don't play that shit. Just sayin:)
Cusio Marcus Hendersonugh!
this question and scenerio is so annoying. Def gives the impression that homosexuality is a choice...Ultimately, those who are still uncomfortable with themselves in my opinion will flip flop until they become comfortable... Definition of Bi-sexual to me....
Sophia Johnson
Ok, this time I read all the comments and here is what I have to say. Sex is an urge, your partner is a choice/preference, and love is uncontrolled.
Adam Video Blog #1 With Jared Shuler
2 Comments Published by His Daily Variety on Tuesday, October 27, 2009 at 1:46 AM.
Purely looking for a short cut!
4 Comments Published by His Daily Variety on Monday, April 20, 2009 at 4:33 PM.
Purely looking for a short cut!
As you get into who you are and what you are to serve in this life, we tend to do an ample amount of cloud skipping.
We bounce from one soft cloud to the next. Totally aloof, not realizing that beneath your very feet the cold hard earth lies below. Brown and green and often unforgiving, the higher you are, the harder you fall, (It’s not always a bad thing).
Yesterday I had an impromptu dinner with a fairly new acquaintance with a harsh sharp tongue. As new as he is I have already learned to take it in stride. I can sense his heart is pure, just busy getting out of his own way like most of us. At this mini banquet hosted by Bubba Gumps, a couple sat across from us. One of them was celebrating a “29th birthday for the 2nd time”. Easy, sweet, held eye contact, both smiled brightly contented to meet me. They talked of meeting at a pride one year, and now owning a home together in ATL. They seemed to listen to one another, and no one talked over the other. "Pie in the sky" I thought out loud! They talked of their careers and personal goals they had set for themselves. They in fact were living their best lives separate from one another, and they have made a union that can and will only grow with happiness because of that very fact!
So the question becomes “Are you living your best life?”
Who's Coming April 30, 2009 NYC - Amel Larrieux at her Best!
0 Comments Published by His Daily Variety on at 11:11 AM.
Lyrics to Gills And Tails :
I looked at my reflection in the water
thought what an unlikely pair
closed my eyes, held my breath, plummeted down,down,down
and anchored myself there
can't tell how long i've been
in the company of gills and tails
i think i feel my skin
growing scales
chorus
can i come up for air
can i come up, can come up
(repeat 3x)
i'm gettin' eaten up down here
i'm just not built like them
the big fish have a monopoly
the little fish get buried in the sand
this here world i'm in
sucks your life out, leaves you comatose
take back your salt and fins
send me a lifeboat
chorus
i look up at longing at the surface
hypnotized by the way the sunlight seems to ride each ripple
and they do a dance
every ray becomes a beckoning hand
i miss the sweet taste of oxygen
i mistook this for the promised land
